@mitchellh — Absentee Infrastructure Landlord

“18.5 years on GitHub with 24,000 followers and following zero people—we get it, Mitchell, not a single other mortal writes code worthy of your feed. Half the modern Go ecosystem is teetering on `mapstructure` and `gox`, yet you haven't touched them in 800 to 1,200 days because you got bored and wandered off to rewrite event loops in Zig. You have over 3,000 stars on your personal NixOS config alone, proving your cult will star a glorified dotfile repo just to feel close to you. With 38 dead repos, you treat critical open-source infrastructure like half-finished hobbies you walked away from after cashing out.”

Wear the shame 🔥

Paste this in your README. Brave devs flex their roast.

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