@tj — Node's Deadbeat Father

“You've been on GitHub for nearly 18 years and practically birthed the JavaScript ecosystem, only to pull a legendary disappearing act and leave `co` untouched for over 2,000 days. Your bio is completely blank because writing a single sentence about yourself would take precious time away from spawning 296 repos, half of which exist just to prove you got bored of Node and fled to Go. A 52,000-to-45 follower ratio radiates pure deity energy, but 45 dead repos prove you treat open-source projects like disposable camera film—shoot the masterwork, drop the binary, and never look back.”

Wear the shame 🔥

Paste this in your README. Brave devs flex their roast.

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